Once and Future
by Mayrose
Summary: What happens after the Battle of Camlann? Camelot has no longer has a king, do they still have a protector? Post series 5. Drabble series.
1. After Camlann

A/N: [Warning: Mostly depressing feels over the finale].

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Merlin looked out over the castle of Camelot. Below him, the regular activity of the streets continued, but appeared subdued. He stared at the figures as they went about their daily tasks. One color stood out among the rest. It adorned every arm in Camelot. Black. The people wore thick strips of the color tied around their arms in mourning. A few dressed completely in it.

Merlin turned away. Already they had heard the news. Already they mourned for their king. The thought of returning without Arthur sank deep in Merlin's heart. He gripped his staff. No, he couldn't return.

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To be continued...


	2. The Sapphire Butterfly

A/N: No warnings this time. Maybe a double update today! I'll try to post the third part later this afternoon.

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A butterfly floated toward the young warlock, the sun scintillating on its sapphire wings. Merlin watched it with sad eyes and recognized it as the first creation of his after his magic had been returned to him in the cave. He lifted his hand. The blue creature landed on his palm and regarded him with something almost like intelligence.

"I don't think I can go back." He whispered. "I don't have the strength to tell them that Arthur is never coming back."

The butterfly lifted and flew at his eyes. Not aggressively, but urgently, as if trying to communicate.


	3. Creator and Creation

Merlin shook his head and the butterfly returned to his palm, "I don't understa-" His vision changed and he felt his consciousness in two separate places. One on the ground, the other flitting above the earth. He was connected to this tiny creature.

Merlin felt the butterfly open it's wings and catch an updraft to the sky. The breeze carried them toward the castle and through an open window.

"What a beautiful creature…" Merlin jumped at the voice and was thrown back to his own reality. The hills above Camelot were as empty as they were when the butterfly left.

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A/N: I know that isn't such a great place to end, but I promised I'd upload it today. The next section might be up tomorrow ...or it might not! ;)


	4. Lost Hope

A/N: Alright! Here's the next part! Sorry I didn't upload yesterday, but today I have two parts so that should make up for it!

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Merlin didn't stop to think what he was doing. Closing his eyes, he searched his mind for a trace of the butterfly's consciousness. He caught the thread that linked them and followed it.

The butterfly rested on Guinevere's hand. She had lost so much: her father, brother, and now her husband. Merlin's heart went out to her. It pained him to see another suffer as he did.

Gwen spoke, "Did you find them?"

"No, my lady," the voice was Leon's, "I fear all hope is lost, Highness. If Arthur was wounded in the battle…" He swallowed, "I'm sorry, my lady."


	5. Morgana's Triumph

A/N: (Despite their various scouting missions, the knights were unable to find Morgana's body...)

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Gwen turned away and tears choked her words, "Did you not find his body?"

Leon's grief filled his voice, "No. They- we think Morgana- we believe she is responsible."

Gwen stiffened, causing the butterfly to flutter nervously, "Is she still a threat?" The disturbed creature returned to its perch.

"She is a powerful sorceress, but she has taken her revenge. There is a chance that Camelot is safe from her for now."

Gwen nodded and turned back to the window. She lifted the hand that still cradled Merlin's sapphire butterfly. She seemed to contemplate it for a moment. "And Merlin?"


	6. Till The Very End

The young warlock's surprise almost caused him to release the connection. But Gwen had no way of knowing that Merlin had witnessed the conversation. No, she was merely inquiring after his whereabouts.

Leon swallowed again, "He would have stayed with Arthur till the very end. The fact that he has not returned confirms our fears about the both of them."

This time Merlin purposefully severed the connection. They believed him dead. If he returned, the very sight of him would give them hope that Arthur was still alive. Merlin couldn't bear to bring such hope only to destroy it immediately.


	7. No Destiny

He turned away with a heavy heart, leaving his home behind. His future held nothing but loneliness. No prophecy told him what the rest of his life held. No destiny had been made for him to follow. He had failed in his only task.

Merlin swallowed the lump in his throat and began to mutter, casting a spell he had become familiar with, but had hoped to never cast again. But he did. The distorted appearance hid the youth beneath the skin of an ancient man. It became a fragile disguise to mask the grief that he could not banish.

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A/N: That's it! (I may turn this into a longer fanfic in the near future.) I hope you enjoyed it! Thanks for reading!


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